Man shoes...

Doesn't that mess of shoes look so good with a pair of man shoes mixed in?... :)
 

You see right through me...

You see right through me...
You know when I'm mad...
You know when I'm sad...
You know when I'm happy...
You got it down to a science...
You have a peephole to my soul...
I miss you so much it hurts...
But even though the distance between us is so great, my arms can't reach you...
My love for you is even greater so my heart is able to reach you...
I love you, my ping...

A part of me...

Come back Ping.... I just wanna be with you always... A part of me is missing whenever you go...

Here comes the tears...

Yup, it's one of those nights tonight...
You left yesterday and I couldn't sleep... Tears wouldn't stop pouring out of my eyes... I was cold and lonely without you next me.. and I tried to keep busy all day today to keep my mind off of things but when the sun goes down it reminds me how alone I really am...

I waited until you called me tonight and was a little surprised and shocked that you didn't want to see my face tonight. I know what happened... but wouldn't seeing me and talking to me make you feel better?

I'm trying so hard to put on a brave face... I just want you to want to see me.. It makes me feel like you don't miss me.. and you have the kids this weekend so I know I won't be seeing you much if at all.. so I thought for sure you would want to talk to me tonight... I'm worried about everything... mind thinking of a million different things and you know I have a hard time when we leave each other.. I just hate the way I feel right now..

i miss you so much...
great, here come the tears...

I'm going to explode...

I'm going to explode if I don't talk or write... So I will write...

I'm feeling so many things... I'm sad.. I'm anxious...I miss him.. I want him to miss me too!!
I got to see him and really talk to him once this last week... Thursday morning... and then this weekend happened.. So with all that I just want to be reassured and have him WANT to see me and tell me he missed me too.. I think i deserve at least a couple minutes..

I want you to know that a part of me was really destroyed this weekend..I don't think you will you ever fully understand what it feels like to have the person you love to be in a situation like that... I don't know if you talk and what you say...I don't know if you sit by each other...it just sucks.. I feel like she got 2 whole days with you.. when I can barely get a min with you in a weeks time.. It hurts my feelings.. and I couldn't even talk to you about it because you were being so short with me and didn't want to discuss it..
I'm the one who is here for you and was there for you during your darkest hours and I'm the one who is putting my whole heart and soul into this, trying to be so understanding in everything you do..

I'm turning 30 in 3 days and I'm so depressed.. with no one to talk to and all I want is you.. I want you for my birthday...
I just want so bad for things to be in my favor for once.. Just reassure me from time to time and especially when something like this weekend happens... Okay?.. I'm just a girl sometimes...
I'm just a girl who has found my everything in you... and I'm scared to lose it...
You fit me perfectly in every way...
You have my heart and I love you...

So much I want to say...

There is so much I want to say to you...
I hope you aren't upset with me.. I hope you still feel the same about me...
I know times are rough and I know and understand what you are dealing with...You are such a strong person to deal with all that you are right now...I know.. I worry about you everyday... I'm trying so hard to leave you alone and just be here... I'm sorry... I really am trying.. I want you to know that you are worth it to me and I'm willing to do what it takes... I hope that I'm worth it to you and that we will continue to get through all this together.. I do know you and I know your heart...I'm sorry if I ever come across that I don't understand.. Sometimes it hits me extra hard how much I miss you and I don't ever want our closeness to go away.. I want us to be strong and be connected always..

I know I love you and I know I want to be you... YOU are my person.. the person I think about first thing when I wake up, the person I think about and worry about all day wondering is he okay, is he eating, did he sleep, how is he feeling, does he know how much I care and love him, You are the reason a smile will appear on my face during the day just thinking of your cute face or something that you may have said, you are the person I think about while driving anywhere wishing so bad you were next to me holding my hand, you are the person I want to call and tell everything to... funny or sad whatever it may be, you are the person I want to eat my meals with, you are the person I want to laugh and cry with, you are the person I want to be around my kids and play with all our kids together, you are the person I want to sing crazy songs with and snuggle on the couch with, you are the person I want to travel with and experience new things with, you are the person I want to kiss each day when I get up in the morning and you are the person I want to hold me at night and whisper things to in bed. You are the very last thought I think about before my eyes close at night. You are the person I want to shower with love everyday....YOU are my PERSON.. That is what I mean when I say that to you... The tears wont stop as I write these words...

You are an amazing person and I feel lucky to have had our paths cross again all these years later... I have loved you for most of my life... I will always be here for you.. I hope you know that.. You mean everything to me... I hope you will be patient and understanding with me too..

Can't wait to talk to you about all this... I hope that you are okay